Even if a mother lives for a hundred years,
She will constantly worry about her eighty-year-old child.
Do you wish to know when such kindness and love ends?
It doesn’t even begin to dissipate until her life is over!
“The Kindness of Ultimate Compassion and Sympathy,” The Filial Piety Sutra
A mother’s kindness and love remains strong throughout her life. I absolutely loved being a mother. I cherished those little arms wrapped around me, that soft sweet breath in my ear, the giggles as we played together.
That is only part of why losing a child is considered the toughest tragedy a human being can face.
And it makes Mother’s Day particularly painful. There is an emptiness, a hole, that nothing can ever fill. There is an ache that will never disappear. It is like a broken hand that leaves one impaired throughout life.
My first Mother’s Day without my son Brennan is this weekend. I read of another mother who lost her only child to heroin, and another who lost two sons to heroin in one night.
So while my heart aches for Brennan, I feel deeply grateful for my second child. Out of my six pregnancies, he is the only one alive today.
I cherish our time together. I now have a little time to read books he suggests so we can talk about them. We have a weekly ritual of eating out. And we discovered Escape Room adventures during which we are locked in a room for an hour and have a series of puzzles to solve. We’ll be doing one on Mother’s Day.
Brennan would have loved participating with us. I will invite his spirit to join us on this fun adventure. I will make the most of my time with Jason. And I will embrace both the incredible joy and unbearable agony of motherhood.
Thriver Soup Ingredient
One possible way to celebrate Mother’s Day and enjoy connecting with family members is with a Room Escape adventure. There are many companies offering them in major cities across the country.
2 thoughts on “Embracing the joys and unbearable agonies of motherhood”
Heidi, I am so sorry for your loss. My 2nd son was following that path. He had been in and out of treatment several times. Always relapsed. (4 years) Then by the grace of God it finally clicked & HE wanted to stop the cycle & he did what he needed. 10 months clean & sober. He attends a meeting every day. It scares me to talk about it.
Oh Peggy, I know the terrible pain. SO thankful he wanted to stop and what a remarkable gift, 10 months clean and sober! And in a meeting every day! Something great to celebrate on Mother’s Day.